From The Innkeepers

September 2024 Blog
Affecting the Quality of Someone’s Day

Occasionally the positive affects we have on one another come home to roost. It has been that sort of summer for us.

Earlier this week, a person that was in our yoga class, called me on the phone out of the clear blue. I had not seen this woman in probably 10 years. She had come to the Inn for several events years ago, and other than that, our conversations were limited to before and after yoga class. In those relatively brief encounters we spoke of everything from the sublime to the mundane. We exchanged ideas on good books to read, and solved the problems of the world. This week, she called me to thank me for the profound influence we have had on her life. From recipes, to Sharon’s favorite spices and where to shop for them, to our conversations on a more spiritual level, she recalled for me all these bits and pieces from the times that our lives crossed paths. Even as she spoke, I felt they were seemingly very common interactions and certainly nothing out of the ordinary. But she kept reiterating what a strong impact we have had on her life, and because she had never expressed that to us, that day she was inspired to act on what she perceived to be a long overdue expression of gratitude. It changed both her and myself. It brought home to me once again the power and the importance of not just being grateful, but of releasing that gratitude in a visible way into the world. It made my day. For someone to say that “you mattered”, is a very affirming moment.

At the beginning of August, the three of us went to Detroit to attend the religious celebration of a friend’s 75th Jubilee as a Sister of Mercy. The ceremony was a beautiful testament to the lifelong commitment of these women to service, and to the ideal of bringing mercy and compassion to their various ministries. At the dinner following the service, I was able to reconnect with several friends from my teaching days at Mercy High School, as well as others I met through some of the Sisters I had known. One woman in particular that we had not seen in about five years, came up to Pat and I to thank us for opening our home to her and taking her in when she had nowhere else to stay, and no financial resources to rely on until she found a job. That was about forty years ago, and quite honestly, we had totally forgotten about it. To us, it was the most natural thing to help someone get a leg up and get on their feet after a life altering change in the circumstances of her situation. But once again we felt blessed to receive her gratitude. It made that weekend all the more special for us.

And lastly, earlier this summer we had the privilege of hosting two of my former students from Mercy High School for a lovely evening of dinner and conversation. Both of them were very grateful for the ideas we had shared so many years ago. Both have since become physicians, and have been working in areas such as medicine’s impact on climate change, and in clinics for those who cannot afford medical care. They truly are women who are making a difference in this world, and it was gratifying to know that I played some small part in it. During the course of our visit we shared with them our origin story of the founding of the Inn. We explained the impact that cultural anthropologist Angeles Arrien’s writings had on the trajectory of our lives. About a month after their visit, one of the women sent me an email to thank me, not only for the influences on her life when she was a student, but also now for introducing her to the works of Angeles Arrien, particularly her book on the Second Half of Life. You affected my life then she said, and you continue to do so now, some 40 years later.

To have been the recipient of three life affirming events in relative proximity to each other, has been a blessing beyond imagination or expectation. We live our lives not in the public eye, but still quietly go about doing good whenever we can, or whenever we realize that this is what we need to do now.

Long ago Henry David Thoreau said “To affect the quality of the day, that is the art of life.”
We had placed that quotation in the very first brochure we had printed about the Inn when we were first opening our doors. It was part of our mission statement of how we hoped to live, and how we wanted to be present for our guests. It has come full circle now as it becomes evident that we did do what we set out to do. It is wonderful to have lived long enough to see some of that be reflected back to you in the form of gratitude. In each one of the above situations someone deeply affected the quality of our day and we theirs. There is an art to crafting a life, and to crafting the lives of others. One of the most powerful tools we have at our disposal is the expression of gratitude. In each situation, saying thank you, not only in the moment, but years later can make the recipient of your gratitude feel that their life was indeed well lived.

My hope is that by sharing the stories of these three experiences you will be inspired to “make someone’s day” in whatever form that takes for you.
Our busy season of autumn is upon us. Between now and the Thanksgiving holiday when we take a respite to be with family, many of our favorite people will come through our gate. We look forward to seeing so many of you who have made our life experience here a meaningful one.

With blessings and gratitude from our hearts to yours,
Marcia, Pat, Sharon, and Ryan
Keepers of the Rustic Gate